Thursday, February 5, 2009

Always open with a joke

Why did Tucker Max cross the road?

I don't know. But Tucker Max is a massive faggot so fuck him.

Mildly interesting post on this blog.. just the usual dismantling of the Tucker Max e-persona.

You can now download IHTSBIH original edition at torrent sites, sadly you will have to pay big bucks for oncoming extended edition - but needless to say the new stories will be 100% awesome and true.

Man, I just love reading the comments on the Youtube video of the book burning:

"congratulations on wasting 15 dollars d bag."

Yeah I'm pretty sure that buying the book itself was a waste of 15 dollars.

"Fucking losers are just sad that you live a boring life. The fact that you did that, video taped it, uploaded it onto youtube shows how sad your life really is."

"...but yo prolly just dont have a sense of humor so you should just shut the fuck up and u really do need to get a life if all do is sit around all day and burn books just because u dont like them"

Yeah. I've got nothing better to do than run down Tucker Max. You can clearly see I'm pouring my life into it. That's why this website is updated thrice daily as me and Barry toil at the printing presses making pamphlets to spread the truth. Please don't forget to subscribe to our RSS and instant text messaging alerts so you can get breaking Tucker Max news as it happens.

"have fun living with yourself knowing that you might be the biggest tool box on youtube. Enjoy the pathetic excuse you have of a life you sad little hypocrite. "

I'm definitely the biggest toolbox on Youtube, but I used to be second to a video of some guy choking out a colleague on the set of a film whilst a small-handed, lispy fuckstick videotaped it. Lucky for me that video got taken down, so now the title is mine!!

Judging from the grammar and idiocy displayed, a lot of Tucker's fans are young teenagers and probably won't be able to get in to see IHTSBIH if it gets R-rated. Kind of makes their relentless fanboy'ing all the more hilarious.

This comment was left on one of my most recent posts, in regards to how many people attend Tucker Max book signings:

Hello, I know this is a bit late, but I noticed you asked questions about his book signing. This is just the rough draft of an account of his book signing in Chicago.I hoped it came off as, for the most part, impartial. I'm kind of a sickeningly positive person though... so if you want just the gist of it. The turn out was huge. I would say it was close to four hundred who came in all, if not more. I'm really not exaggerating. Even after he left some people still came in and that was around 9.45 pm.Hope that helps.

Sadly that link is down at the moment. If the report is true that's a pretty impressive turnout. Tucker Max as a piece of pop culture seems to slowly be coming more into the mainstream.

I was sitting in a bar with a few friends not too long ago, when one guy (a journalism major, really cool guy) turns to me and asks if I've heard of Tucker Max. I tell him I know about him and I've read the book. He tells me about the movie coming soon and about the new book which will be even funnier than the first. I tell him I think a lot of Tucker's stories are bullshit, and he replies so quickly "Yeah! Of course!! They're hugely embellished. He's full of shit"

"Then why do you read them?" I asked.

"Because they're entertaining."

I couldn't help roll my eyes. Even Tucker's fans know his stories are bullshit. But it seems that one small fact isn't stopping him from becoming popular.

Why do I even bother?


Anonymous said...

Hey, Light, I need you to stop by the printers in the morning. The latest bulk printing of our anti-Tucker brochures are ready, and our street team needs them so they can go door-to-door over the weekend.

Barry Bater said...

^^^That was me. I forgot to sign in.

Anonymous said...

The thing is... If he was just telling stories to entertain, this would all be just peachy.

If he weren't so fucking determined to present them as the absolute 100% truth, he really would deserve what he gets.

His stories ARE entertaining, but they're STORIES.

However, the truth is, he's a doucebag, so fuck him.

Anonymous said...

Also, if he didn't act like what he was doing was ultra-important, or act like he was really accomplishing something super-amazing, he wouldn't come off like such a douche.

But he does.

So he does.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I lay awake at night thinking about how much I want his movie to fail. We all have our reasons why we'd love to see Tucker's ego deflate and for me, I honestly get twitchy and excited just thinking about it. I want the public to invalidate monsieur douche's antics.
Fingers crossed.

Anonymous said...

^ Wow.

Unemployed Asshole said...

Hey, thanks for the link. Keep fighting the good fight, this guy's a retard.

Anonymous said...

It really pisses me off that he calls this bullshit movie of his 'art'. What is artistic about jokes about shit and a strip club scene? Well that scene might be ok. But what is artistic about jokes about shit?

Fuck the arrogant Douche, I hope he tanks.

Anonymous said...

You just don't 'get it'. It's not about drinking and shitting, it's about the freedom and joy that comes from throwing off the shackles of what society tells you that you should be, and finding your own path to...

...oh. Oh, no, wait. Tucker edited all that 'deep meaning' stuff in later, to justify his empty, wasted life. My mistake.

Anonymous said...

Does anyone like comedies websites? Tucker Max is good at comedies.

Anonymous said...

This whole blog and that video of the book burning just contributes to his persona, no matter how much of that persona is bullshit.

He tries to push the image of him being a total douche, so why do you think a blog dedicated to arguing that point would achieve anything more than help him?

Anonymous said...

This shit just validates him even more. Don't you guys get that?

Anonymous said...

Having my say here boys..

Come join and comment and let us in an intelligent way get rid of this twat.

Anonymous said...

1. you do not know how to spell
theres an H in there =].

2. your life is sooo boring, that you have to spice things up by going door to door proclaiming to the world about how jealous you are of another man's life?

3. from what i have seen on your website, and from the depth of which it seems you have studied his website, constantly looking at his updates and quoting them, it seems like you spend hours a day on his webite.

in loser shitbag terms -- you idolize him =]

4. by buying his book, even just to burn it none the less, you are supporting him, and thats another fifteen dollars in his pocket.

5. delete your youtube account, delete this forum, and stop embarrassing yourself by proving that you have absolutely no life.

Anonymous said...

^^^ You're about an idiot.

1.) This isn't the 'doucebag' blog. Way to pay attention, dumbass.

2.) Nobody goes door-to-door. You, sir, missed the joke so badly, I think you actually DODGED it.

3.) It seems like you would have to spend hours on this website in order to ascertain that.

4.) The burner specifically stated that he bought the book used. Tucker didn't make any money off of him. Man, reading comprehension is just kicking your ass today, isn't it?

5.) Cancel your internet service, kill yourself slowly, and stop wasting our time.

Nicey said...

"3. from what i have seen on your website, and from the depth of which it seems you have studied his website, constantly looking at his updates and quoting them, it seems like you spend hours a day on his webite."

You're aware the website has been updated I think 3 times this year.

Yeah, they just sit around and look for Max quotes. If you go to Tucker's site, he's there everyday, looking for someone to please, please, please respond to because the traffic is so low.

Shouldn't he be focusing on taking writing classes, making a network, trying to evolve his career? And not hanging out on his own website all day?

Anonymous said...

Nicey, it doesn't seem like Tucker needs advice on how he should be spending his time. Regardless of what you think of his productivity, he seems to be doing very well for himself so far. I'm surprised at how fast he got the movie to the point that it is now, practically on his own (well, independent of a major studio's help). I'm also surprised at how popular he seems to be among college kids. I'm curious as to whether this is all due to "word-of-mouth" or what. At any rate, I don't take anything he says seriously, but I do enjoy his work and am looking forward to seeing the movie.

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